Tips on handshaking from an AOL article:

[capri0mni]

(Yes, I have aol, and I am lame. Deal. Things like this at least offer some lolz)

Things You Should Do

Be Friendly You should always be ready to initiate a handshake, demonstrating your eagerness to meet the person. Although etiquette rules once dictated that a man should wait for a woman to offer her hand, that's no longer the case.

Show Respect Make sure you're standing when you shake hello or goodbye. It shows respect for yourself and the other person.

Be Direct Look the other person in the eye. Don't allow the handshake to linger too long, but you can show an extra bit of sincerity by holding their hand a second longer after the last pump.

---
Um... that second one kind of leaves me in the cold, doesn't it?

And one my mother added, particularly for the self-styled "charming" men out there:

Follow the other person's lead If someone offers her hand for a firm shake, do not turn it and kiss the back of her hand, instead. It's not romantic. It's condescending. A less gender-specific variation on the theme: if the person offers her/his hand for a firm shake, do not squeeze her or him in a bearhug, instead.

Basically, it all boils down to: The way a person offers their hand signals what her or his boundries are. The way you take that hand signals how well you respect those boundries. Period.

Comments

[snowgrouse.livejournal.com]

...they didn't say anything about giving a proper, firm squeeze? That always gives a better, more frank and honest impression than a limp handshake. I hate those. *grumble* and they tell me *my* social skillz suck...

[pedanther]

A firm squeeze is not always correct, though. It comes back to the thing about following the other person's lead; if they go for a limp handshake, squishing their hand is impolite.

[snowgrouse.livejournal.com]

Bah. Okay, I fail at that. I refuse to become limp just because someone else is, when I'm introducing myself. That's just... not me.

[pedanther]

You know what? Ignore what I said. I was really thinking about the sort of crushing grip they're talking about further down the comments; which, as they correctly note, is not the same thing as a proper, firm squeeze.

[capriuni.livejournal.com]

Yes, they did... they gave definitions of five different kinds of handshake, with special names (they called the one you're describing "the dead fish"). This bit was just the three closing points, for all of the different kinds.

I don't go limp, but there have been people (usually macho, patriarchal men who're apt to call me "sweetie") who deliberately squeeze with all their pressure on my knuckles, instead of the clinching point of the meat between forefinger and thumb. "firm squeeze," and then, there's "Ouchie!"

Sinces it's an aol article, I'm not sure if a link will work, but I'll cut'-n-paste the rest, at least, if you're interested.

[indefatigable42.livejournal.com]

Yeah, firm is one thing but ouchie is another. A handshake is not supposed to be a demonstration of physical prowess.

[capriuni.livejournal.com]

I was actually experimenting on myself after I wrote that last comment, to see what it is that makes a handshake an "Oucher."

The difference is not only how hard you squeeze, but in what direction. It's squeezing straight up and down that hurts. But squeezing diagonally, closer toward the heel of the other person's palm isn't so bad.

If the other person is gritting his teeth while smiling at you, that's a sign you may be doing it wrong.