Meanwhile, back at the ranch:

[capri0mni]

1. So help me, I signed up (and subscribed) to eHarmony. It started out just as an experiment to see what, exactly, they asked about you, and how they catagorized you. But in order to see the results of the experiment (as in: get further details beyond the first page of information, and/or actually talk to your "matches") you have to pay, so...
   So far, it's like filling out a meme quiz, but to the tenth degree. This may be a great big swallower of time.
   
   The first time I filled out my profile, I said I was "Spiritual, but not religious" (I'm actually Atheist, according to most definitions of "god," but believe the whole of the universe is greater than the sum of its parts), but that I was willing to have a relationship with people of any religion, and that it was "somewhat important" to me that they matched. And I got a lot of matches from guys who said the first thing they were most greatful for was their relationship with God and their churches. So I think "Spiritual but not religious" might be code for "Go-it-alone Evangelicalism." So I switched my choice to "neither spiritual nor religious," and upped its importance level from 4 to 5 (out of 7).
   
   Now, I'm getting more scientists and mathematicians answering. This is of the good. I'm a great fan of science.
   
   Still, there seems to be a large proportion of otherwise intelligent and well-educated men in their forties who place very little importance on proper spelling and/or grammar. And while eHarmony gives you a bunch of multiple choice reasons for declining a match (I did mention this was Memetastic, didn't I?), "Careless use of the English language" was not on the list.



2. Back on February 23rd, I posted the beginnings of my song, "The Man in the Moon Went Walking (and lost his punctuation)", but I never posted the finished song.
   
   Well here are all the verses I wrote (The code for the tune, should you want it, can be found through the link above):
   
   Oh, the Man in the Moon,
   he went into a swoon,
   for his cellar was empty of claret.
   'Til he looked to the Earth,
   And saw wonder and mirth
   And he thought to himself: "Why not try it?"
   
   So he then did descend
   down the stairs of the wind
   And both hither and yon he did saunter.
   And it opened his eyes,
   for he sure was surprised,
   by the strange and fantastical wonders.
   
   Chorus:
   Oh, a traveling lad
   he will never be sad.
   So the Man in the Moon, he went walking.
   And the stories he told
   of the things to behold,
   Well, the Loonies back home are still talking!
   
   Oh, he met with a cat
   in a fine derby hat
   oh, there stood a man made of wrought iron
   there a gate blocked his path
   with a deep belly laugh
   then the engineer stoked up the fire!
   
   And humpback whales
   swim with hammers and nails
   there were needles all made of fine velvet
   there a curtain hung down
   over all of the town
   there the glistening snow made a carpet.
   
   (Chorus)
   
   Then he saw a fine house
   in the jaws of a mouse
   just a crumb of cheese dancing the samba
   there a woman the size
   of a fine grain of rice
   still that nugget of gold saved the gambler.
   
   And then down by the shore
   He went walking some more
   and he saw a ship covered in feathers
   there a bird flew away
   with the talk of the day
   then the jester confounded his betters.
   
   (Chorus)
   
   Then he saw a sheep's head
   such a bright orange-red
   there a carrot as tall as the steeple
   there an oak tree so grand
   walking up on his hands
   oh the acrobat pleased all the people
   
   Then he took his repose
   there beneath a long nose
   'twas a smile as wide as the valley
   oh, a bridge there was built
   between wishes and guilt
   then the love affair ended so sadly
   
   (Chorus)
   
   By the river he spied
   a stone mill in full stride
   there a gentleman came up beside him
   oh he saw a fish caught
   by a net deep in thought
   then he longed for the home left behind him
   
   So he climbed, once again,
   up the stairs of the wind
   and although his vacation was dandy
   after all that he saw
   it seemed better by far
   that from now on he'd drink only brandy!
   
   (Chorus)



3. The last time I tried to scan anything, I failed because my hard drive was so fragmented. So I defragmented. Then I tried again, and discovered that all possible drivers for the scanner had vanished from the hard drive, and even opening the "Scanner and Digital Camera Wizard" showed that there were no scanner drivers to choose from on the disk. This is frustrating and woe-full. Woe.