The Monster Poem Cycle: #4: "Identity"

[capri0mni]

One thing I learned in high school math (besides the fact that I prefer learning math outside of school), was that it takes plotting three points before you can be certain of your line. It wasn't until I finished up the third poem that I recognized the connections I'd already made between them, in the form of recurring motifs. This one starts off at the point almost at the end of the last one, right before the closing couplet ("So our identities, are fragile, caught/Between what's in our dreams and what's been filed."); I wanted to be clear that I meant the complex, shadowy dreams of our subconscious, and not the saccharine substitute for "fondest wish," So that's where I began.

THE MONSTER'S CHALLENGE OF IDENTITY

Just as a rowboat scrapes the pebbled beach
I drift back from my sleep to feel the bed.
Receding like the tide, just out of reach,
A dream slips, half-remembered, from my head.
The nightly riddle posed, always the same:
It asks me who I am, beyond my name.

The question's asked again out in the crowd
Reflected in a stranger's troubled glance,
As though I were an insult spat out loud:
A portent for the fickle whims of Chance.
Philosophers in centuries long past
Wrote cunningly and well of God's good plan:
Which creatures were the first, and which the last,
The proper rank and order meant for Man.
And creatures (like myself) who can't belong?
{We were the curly brackets of their set}
To demonstrate, by living, Right from Wrong,
So all remember God, and not forget:
A belief that's set in stone, or so it seems...
Although it cracks, a little, in my dreams.


[Edit: I bet the middle quatrain of the main part seems like a non sequitor to anyone outside my brain, huh? Let me try a fix -- How about:

Philosophers of centuries long past
Wrote cunning answers all about God's plan:
Which creatures were the First, and which the Last,
The proper rank and order meant for Man.

Better?]

Comments

[butterflydreaming]

Each new poem is stronger than the last. This is super great to watch: creation in progress. Actually, I think each poem has had its virtues and individual identity, and is deserving of basic polish (rather than rewrite) for technical reasons rather than concept.

I could see these being a collection or series.

[capri0mni]

Each new poem is stronger than the last

Thanks! I think it's 'cause I've had the practice of writing the previous one each time I start on the next one...

I could see these being a collection or series

Actually, now that you mention it... ;-)

I have been making a series of YouTube videos of each of these poems read aloud... I don't have a camera, so the videos have all been a mix of slide show technique, and Windows Movie Maker's animated title card feature.

The playlist on YouTube is here (The first three so far):

The Monster Challenges: a Poem Cycle

[spiralsheep]

\o/

(Will try to post actual comment-words later if my brain decides to co-operate, heh.)

[capri0mni]

an icon hand cheer is as good as about anything, really. Though comment words are fun, too. :-)

[raze]

I haven't commented much because I am shy of new social contacts even online - which probably makes me come off as totally rude and disconnected. But: I have really been enjoying this series of poems, and feel that this one was very strong. I especially liked the lines: The question's asked again out in the crowd/Reflected in a stranger's troubled glance,/As though I were an insult spat out loud - Really powerful stuff there.

[capri0mni]

makes me come off as totally rude and disconnected.

... or just shy.

And thank you, BTW.

That "Reflected" line is inspired, in part, by one of my favorite Irish proverbs: "The eye of a friend is a good* mirror." A friend will tell you if you have spinach in your teeth, or your buttons are crooked... but won't care a whit if you look old, or "fat."

The shadow side of that, of course, is the judgments of strangers and/or bureaucrats who have power over us.


*as in "honest."